You all must be aware that it has come to that time, of which I must depart from Woolwich Polytechnic school. As sad as you may all feel that your beloved Jonathan is moving on to the next era of his own existence, it is a quintessential fact of life that I must go.
I address this towards all of you, my experience like any long-term experience was not full of ease and joy throughout, instead defined by its ups and downs. It has however, been an experience that I would repeat had I been given the choice to do it all over again. I have learnt many things at this school, from charming my way out of detentions to preserving through the hardships of GCSEs and A-Levels. Some of you, have known me as a Poly boy since I came here in 2011 as a Year 7, and have seen me evolve from a slightly odd child into the amazing Jonathan I am today (who will inevitably become your head of state). I will not take full credit however, you all have undoubtedly shaped my future in one way or another, either through the tough love of detentions and getting shouted at (I am looking at you Ms. Brown…), the opportunity to express my love for politicking (essentially growing my power complex) through the Student Council of which I have been a loyal member for all 7 years (and then Leader) or by the harsh, but fair teachings of Mr. Hombo (I sold the Economics bible, I never want to see that again).
All joking aside, it has been an honour and a privilege to be a student in your classes and a Poly Boy, I wish all of you luck for the future and depending on how well my own future goes, perhaps I shall see all of you quite soon.
(The only case I do not wish to see any of you is if I must go to Year 14, in which case delete this email and never speak of this again).
‘Build me a statue’